What if Dogs Wrote Classic Novels?

The greatest things in the world are, in no particular order, dogs and books. Groucho Marx put it best: “outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”

But what if you could multiply the best-frienditude and put adorable canines in literature?! Or, as Xzibit would say, “Yo dawg, we heard you like dogs, so we put dogs in your book so you can dog while you dog. Dogs!” Here are six brilliant reimaginings of pup-ular novels.

Moby Bone: An obvious choice: dogs are really into finding bones, Ahab is really into finding whales, bones and whales are both white and…live in the sea, sort of? It works. We also just love that doggie sailor outfit.

The Fetcher in the Rye: Holden Caulfield is practically a dog already: he loves whining and looking at ducks and running through fields. Sample dialogue: “Woof woof, bark bark, ya damn phonies.”

A Walk to Remember: It was warm out, the leash was comfortable, there were tons of good smells, and Mandy Moore was somehow involved.

I, Marley: Finally, the “world’s worst dog” gets to take the story into his own paws. Be sure to have tissues ready for the heartrending final chapter when Marley has to bury his owner’s corpse on the family farm.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Puppies: It is a truth universally acknowledge that the original version of this book did not have enough dogs.

Dog with a Blog-to-Book Deal: If there is actually a dog out there that is sentient enough to maintain a regularly-updated weblog, PLEASE CALL US NOW YOUR CONTRACT IS WAITING.

“Picking five favorite books is like picking the five body parts you’d most like not to lose.”
— Neil Gaiman

Q

Anonymous asked:

Are you guys going to have fall internships this year?

A

Yes! We have internships every Spring and Fall. Keep an eye on the Quirk website / social media (Twitter, Facebook) for updates on when those get listed. 

http://quirkbooks.com/page/jobs

Happy birthday to Ernest Hemingway who was born on this date in 1899! He leaves behind some classic novels and plenty of wisdom, albeit a bit booze-saturated (i.e. the whole “Write drunk, edit sober” mantra). Happy birthday to Ernest Hemingway who was born on this date in 1899! He leaves behind some classic novels and plenty of wisdom, albeit a bit booze-saturated (i.e. the whole “Write drunk, edit sober” mantra).

Happy birthday to Ernest Hemingway who was born on this date in 1899! He leaves behind some classic novels and plenty of wisdom, albeit a bit booze-saturated (i.e. the whole “Write drunk, edit sober” mantra).

Via weheartit.com

It’s been a while since we posted a giveaway!

We came across a bunch of Quirk branded watches that we made YEARS ago, and today, we’re giving them away!

Head over to our Facebook to enter. Each winner will score a watch AND The Last Policeman trilogy! Three books! 

Go enter! https://www.facebook.com/QuirkBooks?sk=app_228910107186452

Happy ThrowBOOK Thursday! Today’s post is just in time for the 60th (well, 63rd) anniversary of J.D. Salinger’s classic coming-of-age story, The Catcher in the Rye, which was yesterday.
If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is when the book was published, which was July 16, 1951. Since then, Holden Caulfield has become a household name and continued to teach readers about independence, the difficulties of growing up and that red hunting hats will always be in style. Laced with expletives and “for Chrissake”s, Holden tells his story honestly and candidly albeit a bit unreliably (thank you, high school English class), and the unique style is what sticks with people the most. So don’t be a phony, and go reread this classic to celebrate today!
Here are 5 famous quotes from Catcher in the Rye: 
1. “Sometimes I act a lot older than I am – I really do – but people never notice it. People never notice anything.”
2. “Among other things, you’ll find that you’re not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You’re by no means alone on that score, you’ll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You’ll learn from them - if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It’s a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn’t education. It’s history. It’s poetry.” 
3. “I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff—I mean if they’re running and they don’t look where they’re going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That’s all I’d do all day. I’d just be the catcher in the rye and all.”
4. “Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.”
5. “What really knocks me out it is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it.”

Happy ThrowBOOK Thursday! Today’s post is just in time for the 60th (well, 63rd) anniversary of J.D. Salinger’s classic coming-of-age story, The Catcher in the Rye, which was yesterday.

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is when the book was published, which was July 16, 1951. Since then, Holden Caulfield has become a household name and continued to teach readers about independence, the difficulties of growing up and that red hunting hats will always be in style. Laced with expletives and “for Chrissake”s, Holden tells his story honestly and candidly albeit a bit unreliably (thank you, high school English class), and the unique style is what sticks with people the most. So don’t be a phony, and go reread this classic to celebrate today!

Here are 5 famous quotes from Catcher in the Rye:

1. “Sometimes I act a lot older than I am – I really do – but people never notice it. People never notice anything.

2. “Among other things, you’ll find that you’re not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You’re by no means alone on that score, you’ll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You’ll learn from them - if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It’s a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn’t education. It’s history. It’s poetry.” 

3. “I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff—I mean if they’re running and they don’t look where they’re going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That’s all I’d do all day. I’d just be the catcher in the rye and all.

4. “Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.

5. “What really knocks me out it is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it.

A peek inside the Quirk HQ. Yes, this is what an editor’s coffee mug looks like. 

Read like Rowling: Five Books that Influenced “Harry Potter”

 
The magic of the Harry Potter series (besides, you know, the wand-waving and stuff) is how easy the books are to sink into: the characters are delightful, the language is beautiful, and the lessons are profound. But these beloved tales of adventure and coming-of-age become even more rewarding when you’ve read all the books that its author relished as a reader.
 
The creatrix of the most beloved children’s series of ever is herself a ferocious bookworm (surprising, right?) who read and wrote stories all through her childhood and earned a BA in French and Classics at the University of Exeter. Here are five titles that cast a spell on Joanne Kathleen Rowling.
 
 
The Story of the Treasure Seekers, by E. Nesbit: In a 2000 interview with the Sunday Herald, Rowling called this children’s tale “a tour de force.” She also expressed a more personal connection with its author: “I think I identify with E Nesbit more than any other writer.
 
She said that, by some lucky chance, she remembered exactly how she felt and thought as a child, and I think you could make a good case, with this book as Exhibit A, for prohibition of all children’s literature by anyone who can not remember exactly how it felt to be a child.”
 
 
 
I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith: Rowling has also praised this midcentury young adult novel for its “women who dominate the book. Clever, perceptive Cassandra, who tells the story through her journal; sulky, dissatisfied Rose, a beauty without Cassandra’s brains, whose only escape, as she sees it, is marriage to a rich man; and the immortal Topaz, their young and beautiful stepmother, a hippy well before her time, who enjoys naked hilltop dancing, baking and playing the lute.”
 
 
 
The Chronicles of Narnia by CS Lewis: Few young readers escape childhood without a journey through CS Lewis’s wardrobe, and young Rowling was no exception: she “adored” the books. As an adult, however, she’s said that “reading them now I find that his subliminal message isn’t very subliminal at all” and that “in the Narnia books the children are never allowed to grow up, even though they are growing older. I want Harry Potter and his friends to grow up as well as older.”
 
 
 
The Little White Horse by Elizabeth Goudge: Rowling has called this story her “favourite” and cited it in a 2002 interview as the biggest influence on Harry Potter, “perhaps more than any other book. The author always included details of what her characters were eating and I remember liking that. You may have noticed that I always list the food being eaten at Hogwarts.”
 
 
 
Macbeth, William Shakespeare: Besides the obvious spellcasting and potion brewing, The Scottish Play intrigued Rowling with its themes of fate vs. choice: “I absolutely adore ‘Macbeth.’ It is possibly my favorite Shakespeare play. And that’s the question isn’t it? If Macbeth hadn’t met the witches, would he have killed Duncan? Would any of it have happened? Is it fated or did he make it happen? I believe he made it happen.”
When working with a nervous debut author, we basically hold this sign up for them all the time. <3

When working with a nervous debut author, we basically hold this sign up for them all the time. <3